I have two kids, 4 months and 2.5 years in my KJ with a 60lb dog and gear....not a problem but you must become a master at packing. Car seats don't have to be in the middle it is just a little safer. How did our parents or grandparents ever survive when they didn't even have "car seats"?
Another solution is a small trailer like 4x6 to tow gear in or one of those roof baskets.
Think long and hard before knocking Toyota quality. Personally I think they build the highest quality vehicles anywhere. I had a Toyota mini 4x4 with a ton of miles, never had a problem...ever. Now I have a FJ40 and she is much stronger than any Wrangler that came or comes out of DC. Sometimes you just get one that has problems (see my '04 KJ with t-case, both diff. rebuilt, pinion seal twice w/less than 35k),