WOW I never knew shopping after working all night and not having more than 10 hours of sleep over the past 3 days could be sooooooooooooo much fun!
Step 1- do several shots of favorite spirit
Step 2- make sure momma drives and ya tell her how to drive your Jeep while grinnin
Step 3- make sure she is clothes shoppin next to or near a bar or waterin hole
Step 4- tell her to go have fun, take your time and enjoy
Step 5- piss her off and go to the pub a few doors down (what me no clothes rack and she doesn't like my taste in thonges)
Step 6- do as many shots as ya can while your grin grows bigger and the fuzzy feelin of love flows
Step 7- awwwww man I didn't hear ya beepin horn, come on in and have a shorty
Step 8- she doesn't do shorties so ya HAVE to down it
Step 9- grin grows to full blown smile and the stars are aligning nicely
Step 10- grocery shoppin is next, great I need sumtin to soak up this mess
Step 11- sample as much food as ya can before ya decide ya don't like it from the deli
Step 12- take your time samplin, she food shoppin
Step 13- as ya feel a slap across your head, remember your at grocery store and need beer BEFORE ya leave
Step 14- have younger fellow from store load your groceries, your worn out and full from good deli food ya didn't like
Step 15- make sure he doesn't upset your beer
Step 16- ride president and enjoy cold beverage
Step 17- have kids unload groceries, their not home schooled for nuttin!
Step 18- enjoy more cold frosties while layin out well planned day she had for ya to your taters so they know how it's done!
Step 19- make sure your still married
Step 20- dang it! ANOTHER 20 some years, she's actually enjoyin stupid humor
Step 21- WARNING! for the tates that are very secure in their wedded bliss......as wife complains at home about new clothes that don't fit, remind her of the 115 lbs ya have lost and plan on another 20 when ya get around to it! DUCK QUICK! hope ya move quick all fuzzed up!
ahhhhhhhhh yes, life is grand! Back to step 1
over and out.............
